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Principal: Keep your son under proper control.
Santa: What happened, sir?
Principal: In the sex column, he writes - never got an opportunity!
Picture SMS 92851
Santa: I was screwing my wife last night and she looked back and said, `I'm feeling kinky! Turn off the light and stick it in my ass!`
Banta: Then?
Santa: As soon as I did, she screamed!
Banta: Why?
Santa: I guess maybe next time I should wait for the bulb to cool down first!
Picture SMS 92723
Think before you send Good Morning text to someone.
Banta messaged Santa: GM!
Santa texted back: Tu Apni GM!
Neighbour: Do you have some oil?
Santa: No, but you can use Vaseline.
Neighbour: I am asking for the cooking oil!
Picture SMS 84776
Santa: You know Viagra is like Disneyworld?
Banta: Why do you think that?
Santa: Because you have to wait an hour for a three-minute ride!
Picture SMS 84291
Border Par Jung Shuru Ho Gayi
Santa: Major Sahab Main Dushmano Ki Maa Chod Dunga.
Major: Bhosdike, Dushman Marne Hai, Paida Nahi Karne!
Picture SMS 84102
Santa had 3 trays in his office for files:
IN, OUT and LBW.
Banta asked, "Oye Santa what is this LBW mean?"
Santa replied: Let Bhenchod Wait!
Santa: Last night my wife and I reached the height of sexual compatibility.
Banta: How?
Santa: We both had a headache!
Picture SMS 79592
Banta: What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis?
Santa: You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!
Banta: During sex you burn as much calories as running for 5 miles. Santa: Who the hell runs 5 miles in 30 seconds?
Picture SMS 75047
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