There was an old man named Bill, and one of the things he most enjoyed was playing golf with his old buddy Fred. Bill's wife always commented on how happy he looked after a game.

But one day he came home from their weekly game looking terrible and very tired. His wife asked, "What's the matter, Bill? You always seem so happy after golf and you look miserable right now."

Bill said, "Well, something terrible happened. Fred had a heart attack on the first hole."

"My God, honey!` said the wife, rushing to comfort him. "That must've been terrible!"

"It was," he said. "All day long it was: hit the ball, drag Fred to the ball, and then hit it again..."
Charley, a new retiree greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10. sometimes 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean shaven, sharp minded and a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their "Older person friendly" policies.

One day the boss was in a real quandary about how to deal with it. Finally, he called him in the office for a talk.

"Charley, I have to tell you, I like your work ethic, you do a bang-on job, but your being late so often is quite bothersome."
"Yes. I know boss, and I am working on it."

"Well good, you are a team player. That's what I like to hear. It's odd though, your coming in late. I know you're retired from the Arm Forces. What did they say if you came in late there?"

They said, "Good morning, General. Tea or coffee this morning, Sir?"
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